NSL Insider - Team by Team: Chicago Bulls

by KLEMMELO, updated on Friday, October 18 2019, 02:58 pm EST

It's as fabled a myth told through generations as old as time itself... The NLL is born and with it, many of the most skilled elite in GM's make the strenuous and painstaking journey across the fantasy wastelands to create a league utopia free of oppression and annoying errand boys.

A feeble minded but seemingly keen individual known as Dazman ventures out and against all his will chooses the path of a team other then his beloved Golden State War... I mean Chicago Curry's.

In swoops the cunning Brazilian known to those from the beginning, outcast and forbidden in the past but looking for redemption (If memory serves me correctly he was wearing a majestic cape that cured the sick in it's spare time... Probably). Chicago was his new home and with it a blessing twas handed to the brave and courageous while smiting those who look to shy away from the light.

Pick number 2 in the NLL inaugural draft which brings unlimited possibility... Cries of heart ache ring out across the league as everyone congratulated bar but one who would crawl back to his master for another season of snide remarks and public humiliation. I for one, being the one who campaigned for the wonder boys return smiled with a clenched fist wondering what have I created?

Soooo Anthony Davis... Der.

fast forward approximately 32 seconds post draft and the one known as Daz "back stabbing goblin "man suddenly remembered he had no time for a world of unbridled bliss and fantasy heaven but instead opted to bail out and return to the wrath of he who shall not be named.... It rhymes with (Lame Plonkfeld) a legless Klay Thompson (Traded him just in time) and 65 games of Steph Curry, because history has shown us that this formula is the key to 2k based fantasy success....

The sleazy kiss of Judas...

CHICAGO BULLS!!!!

The Brazilian Blur is back people! For those who need to be introduced to the man of many skills he is an OG! Original GM that is! While he is off charting the globe and probably saving helpless babies from house fires this guy is as good as it comes when were talking fantasy basketball.

The Blur himself with the classic "Only God can judge me pose". Legend.

He's SO good that he felt the need in silent protest to allow others to have a fighting chance by blowing deadlines and spitting in the face of stupid rules and regulations and subsequently getting fired in a bid to let the next hungry buck to have a shot at glory! He's specifically told me this wont happen again and I couldn't say no to that cute accent. What a man!

To no surprise he has put together a monster of a team with a core of AD, Wall, Kuzma and Randle. Whats impressive is the level of talent with the guys from 5-10 which names like Lou-Will, RJ, Mcgee and Monk. A nice mix of veteran experience, upside and one of the most dominant players in the game today. He's been a smart boy and kept all his draft assets and even with Wall presumably out for some time still will be more then competitive night in and night out.

DRAFT HIGHLIGHTS:

John Wall - Yeah its the worst contract in the league but this dude could walk into the NBA 30 pounds overweight, cursing his team mates names and while still not addressing his obvious problems with substance abuse and 2k will still drop his offensive consistency down a few points and send him on his way. He will ALWAYS be an elite guard in our league whether you like it or not
and the Bulls are already capped to the Hizzay so as if they care.

Kyle Kuzma - Great underrated wing with promise and upside. Already providing elite 2k numbers with pre season splits of 14/4/2/1 with shooting splits of 50/41/88. Dude will get looked upon kindly by the 2k gods as they jack it over the Lakers all year long.

Julius Randle - Dude is going to paaaaaad stats like a mofo and don't tell me because its for the love of the Knicks because no one loves the effing Knicks bruh. Maybe it wont translate AS much to 2k but he'll still be an above average starter on his worst day.

Malik Monk - This kid is a walking bucket. Not as good as the Kings Dwayne Bacon (what a steal by the way!) but he is the perfect versatile swing man for a real life Hornets team who has just pulled the plug and justfies paying millions to guys who played 2 and a half decent play off games and torched Eric Bledsoe... I mean even I could torch that dude. Hell Eric Bledsoe himself torches that dude.

A picture of Dwayne who is a guy Monk looks up to and wishes he could be. (No photos of Malik Monk could be found as he is not as big time as his team mate pictured above).

Lou Will - Cheap bench scoring crucial for a team wanting to go for it all. Insurance on some nights while Wall rehabs and Reggie reminisces of those good 'ole Thunder days. Will take a hit in the NBA after the Clippers went from "Ill have her home by 7:30 sir" to "I own half of Microsoft and time is just a concept for the weak" but 2k wise will be the bench backbone for the Bulls.

...LOW LIGHTS

Beasley and Mirotic are missing in action and although Beasley's wet AF mid range game is awesome to see it's Mirotic running back home to beat up on slow, non-athletic no bodies to make himself feel better that will hurt the most. 2k Algorithms are sophisticated sure but not good enough to factor in the possibility of tanking as hard as Nikola did in the post season. He would've been handy as in this league.

Valentine... The dude will be out of the league in the next couple years. Has been buried behind some really capable guards and wings for the NBA Bulls and his shot is horrendous. I really liked the guy when he first came in thinking he'd be the prototypical two way guy who could play the 2-3 but it just hasn't clicked for the guy.

Bender... Dude how does everyone already hate a guy who's 7'1 can shoot the three and is pretty athletic for his size... He's also 21 by the way. Will bounce around a bit and MAYBE land a solid gig some where. I mean if Frank the Tank, Myers Leonard, Kelly Olynyk and Co. can get a spot then surely this guy can pull his finger out and do the same. The Bucks at least have a need for him with Illy being the only stretch four type on the roster.

TRADES/TRANSACTIONS SO FAR!....

"Chicago exercises it's team option for Chris Boucher"

Blockbuster! I remember when this lit the league on fire at the time and people were looking around confused.. "How did we let this happen?! Wait is it Booo-sheeer?... Bow-Charr?... Brochure?!".

"Chicago exercises it's right to tell the Kings to politely go find some stars to trade for 30c on the dollar again after Mcgee is brought up again for the 7th time"

Smart move. Clear win here... Sources say the Bulls were unwilling to deal Mcgee for a number of reasons even if it involved dumping 14+m in salaries in ether Reggie or Gordon. This unbiased writer believes that if the Kings would stop low balling and offer Rose, Dwayne "Sizzling" Bacon and tasty filler salary for the meager price of Mcgee and one of your guards then you'd be crazy not to take it.

WHAT DO I THINK!?!...

Wall really is the only legitimate trade chip but has so much negative value at the moment given the circumstances. If he was to come back healthy and looking the goods is he going to be available for trade? Who takes him is the real question but there may be a few willing to stash a guy while giving up not a lot at the same time. Otherwise Randle seems to be an odd fit next to AD and Kuz and would always be limited playing alongside them. A few strong weeks here or there perhaps when ether of the aforementioned players are resting/out and it may be a platform for some interest to be drummed up around the league.

To a lesser extent Reggie and or Gordon seem to be the odd man out if Lou will is set to handle the ball ether as a starter or back up 6th man type. Both have their uses and will be asked about all season long if Merencio was to ever play with the idea of moving one.

If he trades Monk ill personally punch the dude in his beautiful, sun kissed face because that kid is a baller and wouldn't surprise me if he finds himself starting soon after the season starts. Completely disregarding everything I just said, If he could somehow pry his better known and tastier team mate in Bacon off the kings while throwing in multiple draft assets then I could see it possibly being worthwhile.

PREDICTIONS!

The Bulls could seriously go the whole way because let's be real the East is obviously more future focused currently as a whole while the real killers are for the most part out West. It's wide open and he has AD who in 10 games so far is putting up 23/15.4/3.9/1.8/1.8 shooting 57% from the field and 84% from the line. He won't have Wall for some time but will be able to coast to a conservative record of 52-30 and that's assuming Wall is a now show. With him I would see them winning 57-58 if they can get it right.

They will lock up home court no worries as the Nets, Pistons, Heat and the Wizards seem to be the early favorites for title contenders out East and will be the Bulls top tier competition. That being said though the Wizards will be holding out on their second best player in newly acquired Nurk, the Heat could blow it up at a drop of a hat or just decide whats only important to them is just "giving it a red hot crack" over actually winning basketball games (we don't believe you Pete), The Pistons rely almost completely on the health of BG and the Nets might eventually figure out that playing 5 big men at once might not end up being an effective game plan. I see the Chicago bulls getting the third seed at least and being a menace come post season with the experience of a guy like Merencio at the helm.

	NY	53
	PHI	52

	TOR	89
	ATL	112

	IND	113
	TOR	103

	DEN	112
	ATL	107

	PHO	108
	BKN	101

NSL Insider - Team by Team: Chicago Bulls

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