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News - Sacramento Kings - KLEMMELO
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A Page in Kings history?...
When people
reference the term "That's one for the history books"... Or something
to the effect of;
1. A moment in time or series of events/A decision or action... That leads to influence or change that will by all accounts, effect others and/or generations to come... Even if it only happened due to a chance or fluke occurrence.
- An event that takes place that will most likely never happen again. (Ether due to elite skill that's almost impossible to replicate or just simply because integrity and honor aren't always a priority to some in the community).
Example: Such as, being successful in meaningless endeavors and while doing so, still needing to take advantage of others good will and innocence while also not adhering to clear set rules. These events can sometimes be dictated with a foot note/prefix. More commonly known as an "Asterix"
-"The
Klemmford definition"
All Jokes and hard hitting facts aside, "The history books" can just be a throw away line coined by lazy beat writers and washed up small market color commentators, to make a round about, nothing point that we just witnessed something special... While cleverly knowing its not expected of one to be able to cite any kind of meaningful stats or insight into why I should be impressed. Veteran shit right there, deeeep in the Quuuuueeee.
Simply put, It's just a name etched in history... If I'm higher then you then I'm superior in every way. It's the rules. It's a yardstick for those who came before and those who will follow in the footsteps of their hero's. It's a method used allowing pivotal points that shape our league and fantasy community alike can be allowed both recognition... And more importantly, irrefutable evidence to draw from when one may be big noting or engaging in "Bants". Or what they used to call it back in my day; Relentless and emotionally crippling harassment.
High anxiety and
self esteem issues aside... Hypothetically speaking... Do you think you could
look your grandchildren in the eye and tell them one day long ago, you were the one
person, somehow given all the control... Who deemed it necessary to
trade, arguably the greatest player of all time?... No. No you would not, you
take that shit to your grave like a man and let your grandchildren continue
respecting you and valuing your ability to make adult decisions....
But think about
it... You don't want to be that hack ass coach who's name I can't remember who
cut MJ as a freshman and has to now live knowing you literally slapped young black
Jesus in the face and are going to Hell.
So do you want your quick
hitter punch line you should've got 14 minutes ago?... KLEMMELO obviously
doesn't give a shit about history books.
The way he sees it is... One WCF toweling with prime black hole Melo leading the way against an actual legitimate fantasy basketball team is worth 10 times the poor mans Justice Winslow you tanked 7 years for to find out 4 years later he is a poor mans Dallas Mavericks Rondo. Jokes on you, I'll be the one welcoming that snapping turtle face mofo when long since been blatantly obvious that there is no upside here mate.
In the fabled history books It'll read... "2021 Champion for the Sacramento Kings.... Rajan Rondo. Anything before this doesn't matter".
Take that for History.
Now since I've made my GM cred flowering about seeming like I said a lot but not really, I can get on to the real angle I'm taking here... The Sac tabloids still all read the same ole Jazz it has for years...
"Bled bath and
beyond relocated... In return...
Lebron's ultimate Nemesis; Unproven Rookies who
are too young, but not young enough to of come into the league with dreams and
aspirations of hitting corner threes from pinpoint Lebron pocket passes like a good boy...
So it seems Ingles has come along for another go around...
Back lash after reports
that the Kings want to pay Bog more then his whole home country is worth per
year. Hopes are they have the "Wrong" Bog...
Lebron drops another
cryptic tweet with 47 hash tags. Inspires millions...
GM Klemmelo lets slip
that the Kings will see if they can somehow play Lebron more then 48 minutes...
You mean to tell me Slim Melo is on the table?"
Rewind just a tad and picture the same brazen and unpredictable rookie GM who systematically dismantled a perennial Western Conference powerhouse into way past prime Melo, Raymond Ghetto bootie Felton, something vaguely reminiscent of Taj Gibson and every year offloading all his firsts for guys like Patty and Ingles after a 4 day bender celebrating nearly getting a bronze medal at the FIBA Games... Or for a big wad of GMs to throw at Melo for nostalgia sake 6 years on from "Olympic Melo" even being a legitimate first ballot hall of fame justification... Only to have him opt to play for arguably the worst team in the league. I thought we had something special Melo, they wont let me change my name you know... #Regretz
That was all the
warm up for the real deal obviously... You plebs let Lebron fall to 12 and at
that exact moment, to everyone's thunderous applause and admiration... Klemmelo
felt what true power must feel like and like a finely aged club cheddar; Cheesed
his way into the elite OG status... Finally he got his Golden ticket to Join
other all time greats riding the coat tails of Lebron's greatness such as
Pistol, Skip, Lue, Mo Williams, Windhorst, Henry Rivera etc etc... So why would
you want to or even entertain the possibility of trading him?
Here is the case you
would make as a completely reasonable and logical person; (Disclaimer: This is
by no means a shameless hype campaign to move Lebron. Any value perceived or
otherwise gained is non intentional.)
Sooooo Lebron single handed won the Kings 11 more games (yes I went and counted) then what you'd expect from an ole' sack of potatoes on it's last legs... Of course meaning he made the game winning/go ahead basket or winning assist to a score in the last possession of the game. There's maybe 3-5 guys on that level in this league on a good day... The badges are stacked and 2k still has a raging hard on for him... That's the difference between home court advantage and being bounced from the play offs out West.... To put that into perspective; Out East it's close to the amount of total wins the teams have from the 5th-8th seed combined. Flawless.
All Star MVP. 1st team all Defence and All League. Ranked third overall in the NSL as he averaged a tidy 33/8/7 during the regular season. 2nd in Assists, 3rd in PPG, 4th in Steals and 5th in free throws made. In the wake of his trail of destruction, the Kings merry men found themselves with the 4th ranked Offence in the league to go along with the 7th ranked Defence, all the while leading the league in pace (Take that J-mac you fuck)... A hallmark for any Lebron led team. He took home POTW honours 4 times, one less then the MVP.... So a whole lot of just coming up short and "what if's" about Legacy, shitty team mates and coaches. Classic Lebron.
But When it mattered... Where the big boys come out to play, the King averaged 35.8/7.7/8.8/2.1 shooting 51% from the field and scoring from the line. His FT% and numbers from three aren't important, so don't lose focus here... All this over 16 games where they at first went 8-3, right up until they did a Classic JR and couldn't quite keep up with the nifty trails Portland were blazin'... (Lackluster execution due to Horrible team name).
That humiliating defeat in the WCF (While of course carried out with complete class from J-mac, letting the fans have that one home game before crushing their hopes and dreams) tarnished both the reputation and pride of Lebron and more importantly GM Klemmelo. Another painful reminder of how close the top of the mountain was... Rumors of frayed relationships and tension within the team were quickly dismissed... No one would ever think for a second that the King would just up and leave his kingdom just because a better opportunity presents itself right?
I think we're all
missing the more crucial point being that the league would surely implode in on
it's self having to be subject night in and night out to the King wearing some
lame but "edgy" grey scale digital camo city jersey... or anything with
an equally nonsense mascot who would be on the same tier of irrelevance like I
dunno... Dinosaurs that were cool like 100 Million years ago and are now
pigeons and shit, who also probably didn't live anywhere close to Canada ether.
Frauds.
-For when you wanna lose your defender in the street, don't care about your physique and go to sleep with Blake Shelton on repeat.
Lebrons home is droppn' dimes 'til father time comes a knocking which is obviously a sign of revolting and creating a new league as the only option... Until then it's the royal purple reppin' the more gangster side of Cali. He ain't going no where son.
*Subject to change due to level of "Nelsing" and/or while recovering hazzy memories of mistakes made largely lubricated and endorsed by that ole' chestnut; The Friday cleanskin special... Natures way to counteract the existential dread and fear of becoming fantasy stagnant and being prone to self destructive impulse decisions.
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